"A Girl In A Boy's School"
I thought walking while ignoring them will help them get the message that i didn't want to talk to them but nope. I walked it outside to the fields but they were still behind me.
I looked towards to them. Finn was staring at me, trying to figure me out. I didn't even want to know how Matt was looking at me but still my eyes dragged to his hurt face. He looked at me for a second, but then looked at the ground. I didn't know what he was thinking.
I looked back at Finn and said, "What?" I tried to be as casual as possible, something I'm very good at.
"What the hell Cece?" Finn said. I think it was the first time I heard him curse.
He continued. "What's happened with you? You can't just ignore us and think that it'll be fine."
"I-" But he interrupted me.
"You know, I never knew you were someone who could just invite people into your life and push them away. I can't believe you."
I was about to say something. Anything to help him realise that I'm not like that. But for some reason, I couldn't. I just listened to him saying the absolute truth. I looked at Matt, he was looking at me and then looking at me Finn. He was thinking about something while listening.
I had to say something.
"Okay!" I half-shouted. Finn stopped talking.
"I'm sorry, okay?" I said.
Finn shook his head. He didn't believe me.
"Look, I need to pass this year and I can't distract myself."
"So you just completely stopped ignoring me?" Finn said.
I didn't know what to say. I thought my excuse was enough for him to say okay but he made a good point.I didn't have to completely ignore him if I trying to concentrate on my studies."
I looked down. "I don't know what I'm doing." I said.
"Exactly." Finn said. I looked at him. He looked angry. He turned around and walked away.
I could have called him and explained to him but I couldn't. I felt like an awful friend.
I looked at Matt. He was staring at me, trying to figure me out. I didn't know what to say to him so I just started walking away from him.
He quickly came infront of me.
"Okay, what happened?" He said.
I was angry now. Didn't he understand why I was doing this. I was doing it for him but he was so confused.
I didn't want to come between him and Finn. The way he got mad at me. It was obvious right?
"You wanted this to happen, right?" I said, a bit roughly. I don't know why I felt so weak when I'm with him. I just want this all to go away and it'll all be fine.
He looked at me confused. "I don't understand."
"Look, why were you angry at me?" I said. "Because I was hanging around with Finn right?"
Matt looked down. So I was right. I was taking his best friend away from him.
He looked so tired. Like he hasn't been sleeping well.
I felt weak again. "I won't go near him then." I whispered.
He looked up at me. "He's your friend. He's hurt that you just randomly stopped talking to him. it isn't right."
I sighed. " I know but you feel that I'm taking him away from you."
I interrupted him. I had to tell him and make him understand that i won't hurt him. "He's been your best friend all your life. I understand if you don't want me in the picture. I'm just coming in the way."
"Wait stop." Matt said shaking his head. He put his hand on my shoulder to stop me from blabbering. I felt weaker when he touched me. He was talking but i couldn't concentrate with his hand on my shoulder. He noticed and apologised.
I looked back at him. "Cece." He smiled.
"I don't think you're coming in the way at all."
" You don't?" I said, looking confused.
He laughed. "You guys are my friends. I'm cool with it."
I looked down, feeling like an idiot.
"Look you have nothing to worry about. You're a good person. I know you."
He said. "Come on, we'll go tell Finn it was just a misunderstanding."
I guess avoiding problems was stupid as hell.
We were walking it to the school.
"Wait." I said, as i stopped. He stopped too and looked at me.
"If you're ok with me hanging around with him, then why did you get mad when I was with Finn a few weeks ago? Remember? When I was playing pool with him, you got angry at me. There was was something up"
I looked at him, demanding an answer.
"You were really pissed off. But why?"
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